Stirred Up!

So many of you know what I have gone through that 6-8 months with H trying to get him to sleep (and probably many of you, like me, have experienced the same thing).  It has been an uphill battle.  I am tired and irritable all the time.  Im not very nice to Christopher, which obviously has caused a wall to be built between us.  I am exhausted and at the end of my rope. 

I have felt, for months, like I get no answers from the pediatrician about this.  For the last two weeks or so  I have been the sleep nazi with naps and staying on schedule.  Finally last night H slept from 7PM to 530AM!  But, this morning we also had an appointment with Mrs. Debbie (the PA at the pediatrician's office), in a last stitch effort to stay with this office.  She didnt give me the magic answer (which I had secretely wanted but knew wouldnt come!), but did provide me with some great suggestions and some wonderful MUCH needed support.

One of her suggestions was to go ahead and convert H to a toddler bed (which is easy to do becasue our crib converts to a toddler bed!)!  But, upon telling Christopher this, he was negative.  I was and still am discouraged.  I wanted to scream JUST SUPPORT ME PLEASE!  I GET UP WITH HIM TIME AFTER TIME EVERY NIGHT, NOT YOU!  But I just very nicely (or I hope so anyways) excused myself off the phone.

So, while H is naping I reluctantly read the Proverbs 31 devotion for today and cried the whole time (still am), because it fits so perfectly.  She talked about having all the right ingredients (faith, a bible, a church, Godly girlfriends, a devotion subscription, and a quite time) but yet getting stuck and burnt up.  She questioned if your family, marriage, job etc. feels like a whirlwind going through them.  I wanted to shake the computer and SCREAM YES BUT ITS MORE LIKE A MONSOON AND IM DROWNING!  Her answer to this was quite simple, its a good thing and to think of it as God stirring the sweetness in! 

I want nothing more than to be a sweet, Godly woman.  I want nothing more than to have a healthy, thriving little boy who I can teach God's love to.

My prayer for today is that I simply get through todays monsoon.  That God would continue to work in me, making me into a better wife and mother.  That he would make me a little sweeter today!  And finally that He would remind me when im at the end of my rope feeling unsupported that He, my Savior, supports me whole heartedly.  Thanks you Jesus!

For it is God who works in you to will and to act according to his good purpose. Philippians 2:13